Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Her Mother is Dead???

So Mighty Mouse is adopted. It's very obvious.

And she knows that brother and sister grew in mommy's tummy. She grew in her China Mommy's tummy. Even though she wanted to grow in my tummy - she KNOW's she did not. This is almost a daily topic of conversation around here.

MM is nowhere near as advanced as some of the other children her age and much younger when it comes to adoption questions. Some kids start trying to figure this out by the time they are 2. MM gave us until 4 before she started questioning her story and her life.

We have always read her story books about adoption.

We have always watched her video of when we went to get her in China and bringing her home. It's actually her favorite thing to watch.

We have a sort-of Lifebook. It's her story that I put together for her. She likes to flip through it also.

We answer every question she asks - truthfully - not cleaned up or pretty (while balancing age appropriateness).

Sometimes we bring it up for some reason or another.

We attend functions that are full of other adoptive families that look just like ours.

It is not a subject we are afraid of. It is a subject that can be hard to answer her questions about. She doesn't like to hear that we don't know an answer.

This weekend we went through the whole "You are the best mommy in the world" routine she likes to do with me. We were in the backyard pulling up weeds.

Out of the blue she tells me her mother is dead.

She is???

Her CHINA mommy, she tells me.

I tell her I don't know for sure, but I don't think so.

She assures me its true. She remembers.

At this point I hollar over to hubs - Hey! Did you know MM's China mother is dead??

"She is?? He questioned.

At which point MM rolls her eyes and say - "Just kidding".

Now. How the heck was I supposed to handle that? I'm quite sure I bungled it pretty good. But what in the world do you say to that???


I sure hope she survives my parenting.


  1. Your title scared me for a minute! I thought maybe you'd found something out. Oh these girls...always keeping our brains from turning to mush. I missed you yesterday and today!

  2. "I hope she survives my parenting."

    I feel that way minute by minute with the Tongginator.

  3. For a minute there, I thought MM was psychic. :) Sounds like she's got a good sense of humor though. Be thankful for that!

  4. I think reading your blog is preparing me. Of course, my little girl's African Mommy is dead.... but that is beside the point. I still have to be prepared to answer those questions when they come, and they will.
    First I just have to get her here! Sigh...

  5. Wow! I don't know what I would say to that. I would certainly mess it up also. Guess I need to start thinking about that one.
    An Ling hasn't mentioned anything about her mommy in China, but she will talk about when she came with us from China and how she is Chinese. Since I can't find any of our videos, for 2 years, she hasn't gotten to watch them. She know she is from China and can recognize other Chinese. I wish I could find them now. :-(