Friday, July 17, 2009

Autumn Asks: How Do You Reconcile What You KNOW With What You DO???

I know God has my back.

I know God has a plan for us.

I know God will provide.

I know we belong to God.

I know all things are for good.

I truly KNOW all these things.

So how come I'm stressing over the sell of the house?

I'm not worried about where we will live when we get to Ohio.

I'm not worried about getting the girls into school - even if its late - DON'T CARE.

I'm not worried about all the work it takes to set up house.

I'm not worried about packing out of here.

But I'm worried about selling the house.

My parents were military. I've been down this road before. It's not fun. It's downright ugly. It can be very very bad....even though in the END all will be fine.

And I don't want to live like that.

We NEVER would have bought a house if we hadn't been guaranteed a four year controlled tour. Nobody buys a house when they are only going to be somewhere 2 a bad economy.

So, with all that I KNOW about God, how come I can't relax?

I got scolded for being so visibly stressed. By a good person with only my best interest at heart. Someone who knows I KNOW its all in God's timing.

So I visibly relaxed. See, I'm fine. It's all good.

Until my hair started falling out by the handfuls. And I got a cold-sore on my mouth. And I feel sick to my stomach so much of the time.

Apparently it doesn't matter what I KNOW. My body has high-jacked my mind.

And I thought I had myself fooled.

So I'm asking do you let it go....when you truly KNOW its all going to be okay...but your body doesn't agree?


  1. Brutal as this might sound, I'm thinking you haven't given it 100% over yet. The stuff you're not worried about, that's just busywork but selling a house is not. Is there some guilt over the decision to buy in the first place? You can't possibly know the future so let go of that guilt and let God show you what's next girl!!

  2. I don't have an easy answer for your question. I just know sometime about three years ago, my emotions finally started knowing what my knowledge already knew and then my thoughts fell in line. And you know everything that I went through to get there. Sometimes, I still don't know/do according to what I believe, but those times are less frequent, less consuming, than before. I will pray, dear friend, I will pray.

  3. Do you remember how we used to ask our kids who lied to them and told them life was fair? Accepting God's timing when we really don't understand is kind of like that. It really doesn't matter if it's fair or if we like it or if it happens our way - IT JUST IS. Accepting that is part of what helps me to take what I know (God will take care of me, His time and plan are better than mine, etc) and make it what I do. For me lack of worry = acceptance. I hope this helps. I will keep praying.

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  5. Well said, Tricia. I'm praying for you Autumn. Hope to hear from you soon!

  6. I agree that lack of worry most often = acceptance. But when you figure out how to accept, let me know. I'm stressing about something else over here... and it could be bad, but it's probably not. But if it IS bad, it's BAD. Like, life-changing bad. So, as much as I'd like to say, "just give it to God"... sometimes, sometimes that is really hard to do.

  7. I think very few people can let it completely go. I know I have a very difficult job with it. As do the people I talk to about this same issue.
    Good luck! If you figure it out, tell me:)

  8. Um, do you drink? ...JUST KIDDING! Sometimes I think we need to stress, in a physical way. Gets it out of the system. Better than bottling it up. Let out a good yell or two. Yes, we rely on God. We say it, we feel it, we know it. But we still gotta DO, and because we are not perfect in The Fall, we feel stress. God just makes "all things possible".

    Good luck on your move! Where in Ohio?

  9. I don't really have much to add... I just wanted to say keep letting it go, over and over again. God doesn't have a limit to how many times we are allowed to surrender to Him.
    I am really bad about "giving it to God", then picking it up and worried it to death again. Then "giving it to God" again.... repeat, repeat, repeat. Thankfully, He forgives. repeat, repeat, repeat!
    Blessings my friend!

  10. I heard a pastor say that if you have time to worry, then you have time to meditate on Scripture. Find some verses that speak specifically to God's provision and care for you, and then meditate on them whenever you start to worry. And yes, it works! I'm still praying for you too! :)